I grabbed a light lunch at a bistro. It was good. When paying the bill, and leaving a tip, I spoke to the waitress, a young woman. I couldn’t place her accent, so I asked her where she came from. She was a bit tense at the question, but told me Afghanistan. It was only when I started walking away that her answer clicked, so I went back and gave her an extra tip, saying things must be difficult for her. I then walked off again.
A few minutes later I realised the poor woman had broken down when I had given her that extra tip. Had I had my wits about me at the time, I might well have offered her a hug: she really did break down. Obviously, she would probably have refused, but the offer itself should have helped her recover.
If you don’t understand why I said things must be difficult for her, you must remember that the Afghan government contains no men. It contains males, but none of them are men. No man would ever treat a woman the way the Afghan government does: locking them up, denying them an education, preventing them achieving their human potential, denying them their humanity. Hence the Afghan government contains no men. That waitress was one of so many people who suffer from their failure to grow up.
Mind you, whether that’s the reason my small kindness had her break down, I don’t know. As I said, I idiotically failed to speak with her again. She could have suffered from the bigotry of many Brits, their fear of Islam, their failure to control their own fear so that it controls them, their cowardice. Immaturity isn’t limited to Afghan boys. Perhaps that had her on edge, so my moment of kindness was a shock.
Of course, the poor woman may simply have been having a shitty day, and my small kindness after some awfulness caused her to break down for a moment. I don’t know, I’ll never know, but I do hope she recovered and went on to have a much better day.